The Electric Tea Bag Fascist Test

You'd swear they were on acid they're so delusional

  • Which group of Americans promotes ideological cronyism within the judicial system, conservatives or liberals?
  • Which side doesn’t believe “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness” applies to homosexuals?
  • Which side is hostile to organized labor?
  • Which side supports corporate power and the deregulation of industry?
  • Which side believes the separation of church and state is a one-way street?
  • Which side promotes capital punishment and privatizing the penal system?
  • Which side tries to manipulate facts with their own propaganda division?
  • Which side scapegoats minorities and foreigners for all the country’s problems?
  • Which side promotes the supremacy of the military, at all costs?
  • Which side promotes an officially recognized national language?
  • Which side promotes an officially recognized national religion?
  • Which side has been caught skewing elections by disqualifying minorities from voting?
  • Which side is fervently nationalistic?
  • Which side scorns intellectualism?
  • Which side opposes funding the arts?
  • Which side mocks any science that challenges industry’s potential for profit?
  • Which side regularly demonizes Muslims, Asians, African-Americans, Hispanics, gays, environmentalists, secularists, atheists, trade unionists in their 24/7 media empire?

If you agree with any two of the above, congratulations, you’re a Teabagger.

If you agree with six or more of the above, congratulations, you’re a fascist.

If you agree with ALL of the above, glückwünsche, you’re a Nazi.

  1 comment for “The Electric Tea Bag Fascist Test

    October 20, 2011 at 5:34 pm

    I was blown away when I heard one small businessman (from Texas, natch) talking on the radio about he saw sales declining, so he had to lay off twenty percent of his work force of 25. Another one who just doesn’t get it. Talk about your self-fulfilling prophecy. He’s waiting for somebody ELSE to hire, so that he can sell stuff or services. He and about two million of his Mercedes-moving cousins are going to have to bite a big bullet and HIRE ANYWAY. So what if your bottom line goes negative for six months, or even a year? It’s INVESTMENT, baby. And there’s always a down stroke on that Net Present Value curve, at the beginning. But the Aspen crowd won’t take a risk any longer. This bunch absolutely will NOT allow their assets or income to decrease ONE PENNY. You’d have to ask them why. For a clue to how this silver-tray outfit thinks, just move into one of their (gated) subdivisions. Country or city, it won’t matter. Guarantee ya within two weeks one of your new neighbors will be at your door to introduce him or herself. During the “howdy” conversation this WILL come up: How’d you get your dough, or words to that effect? THEY WANT TO KNOW HOW PROFICIENT YOU ARE AT STEALING. They do not want you to make the rest of the pirates look bad. And just think; if you run a business and HIRE, you’re gonna get shunned. Absolutely certain. Maybe THAT’s what the “Occupy” stuff is getting at. I deduce those people would rather be “occupied” and not unemployed. Some very unkind things get said about them, sometimes by MY neighbors. There’s no gate out there, but I guess you could say we’re not living in shanties, either. A man is known by the company he keeps. Especially if he owns it.

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